July 31, 2012

She smiles through it all

I continue to be amazed by Annabelle with her (almost) always positive attitude and beaming smile.
  
 
I have so many topics I want to blog about but sadly I just don't seem to find the time anymore.  Thankfully Annabelle is healthy and doing really well.  She just had her birthday!  Our sweet girl is 3!!  It's so hard to believe she is not a baby anymore - although she will always be my baby.  I'm hoping to play a little blog catch up soon as I have so many pictures and a few fun videos I want to share.

However, in typical me fashion I seem to blog mostly when I am feeling a little down or feeling like I need to reach out to feel that sense of community.  My blog has been such a great place to openly share what I'm feeling at that moment and to passively solicit that needed support from the many wonderful and caring people in my life.  I was recently sharing with someone how I feel like motherhood can be so lonely at times.  I am truly so grateful for the honest, loving support I get so often from other moms.

So what on my heart and mind tonight?  Knee immobilizers - that's what.  Annabelle got her first pair today.  They have been on order for a few weeks but we finally got fitted for them today.  She will wear them each night while she sleeps to help stretch her legs because they are getting really tight.  She tends to keep them bent a lot (due to lack of muscles) and we are seeing her crouching more and more when she walks.  By wearing them at night while sleeping she will be able to get one long stretch overnight.  Don't get me wrong, I am happy she has them as I hear it is much harder to correct the leg issues than it is to try and stop or slow down the tightening with a brace.  But, truth be told I'm sad that my girl needs to wear full legs braces to bed each night.  She is already hooked up to her feeding tube for he nighttime g-tube feeding so this is just "one more thing".  It makes me sad.  I wish I could make things easier and more comfortable for her.  I feel guilty even complaining about it since I know in the big scheme of things it's really no big deal and it's not forever (I hope it's not forever!).  Now that I think about it it no one ever mentioned how long she will need to wear them.  I guess it's probably hard to tell right now but my guess it that it WON'T be forever. 

I had suggested to Branden that maybe we should let her fall asleep than put them on her.  He thought I was crazy (sometimes I am) and didn't agree that was a good idea.  I ultimately agreed my idea was kind of sneaky and would be worse in the long run.  I was just so worried about her initial reaction and I was afraid it would be hard for her to fall asleep.  Thankfully I forgot who we were dealing with.  Our Annabelle is so smart - thank you Lord!  We can talk to her (like a 3 year old) and she listens and she understands.  We explained why she needed to wear them and them we proceeded to put them on.  She said she didn't like them and we let her know we understood.  Then I jumped into typical mommy mode and asked if I could take a picture of her in her new braces.  She happily agreed.  I love that girl of ours, she is such an inspiration!

This was a bit of a difficult angle to photograph but I think you can see that she was smiling and not complaining.  Not real sure why I took these pictures on my phone and not with my camera.   
She happily continued to pose for more pictures .  We were thankful that she was able to sit up wearing them.  She was then ready to read books with her daddy before bed.
I am happy to report that night one went extremely well.  She was very tired tonight and that may have had something to do with it but she fell right asleep.  She didn't cry or complain - she was just our happy girl!  I am so thankful to have someone with such strength and a positive attitude in my life to learn from.  I am so blessed to be Annabelle's mother.
If anyone has experience with night knee immobilizers and would like to share their experience I'd love to hear it - both the good and bad.  I'm all about honesty and I'd love to know what we are up against with these tight legs my girl is developing.  Thank you blog world for continuing to connect me with people who really understand me and my heart.